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The Pew Research Center has long studied the changing nature of romantic relationships, as well as the role of digital technology in people’s lives. This special report focuses on patterns, experiences and attitudes related to the use of digital technology in romantic relationships. These results are based on a survey of 4,860 US adults conducted October 16-28, 2019. This includes those who participated as members of the Pew Research Center’s American Trends Panel (ATP), an online survey panel recruited through national random sampling of residential addresses, as well as Ipsos KnowledgePanel respondents who indicated that they identify as lesbian, gay , or bisexual (LGB). The margin of sampling error for the entire sample is plus or minus 2.1 percentage points.
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Recruiting ATP panelists by phone or mail ensures that nearly every American adult has a chance to be selected. This gives us confidence that any sample can represent the entire adult population of the United States (see our Method 101 explanation of random sampling). To further ensure that each ATP survey reflects a balanced cross-section of the nation, the data is weighted to match the US adult population by sex, race, ethnicity, party affiliation, education and other categories.
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For more information, see the report’s methodology. You can also find the questions asked and the answers given by the audience in the top row.
Amid growing debate about the impact of smartphones and social media on romantic relationships, an October 2019 Pew Research Center survey shows that many Americans find some technology issues with their significant others.
For example, among adult couples in the United States—that is, those who are married, cohabiting, or in a committed relationship—about half (51%) say their partner is often or sometimes distracted by their cell phone when trying to hold a conversation with them. ; and four in ten say they are at least sometimes annoyed by the amount of time their partner spends on their mobile device.
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Coupled adults under 50 are especially likely to express the feeling that their partner is distracted by their phone, and those aged 30-49 are more likely to report this. 62% of 30-49-year-olds and 52% of 18-29-year-olds who are in a relationship say that their partner is at least sometimes distracted by their phone when trying to talk to them. Still, this problem isn’t limited to younger age groups: 41% of partnered Americans 50 and older say they’ve encountered this in their relationship at least sometimes.
With phones being a distraction, people may be tempted to look at their partner’s phone. However, there is a broad consensus among the public that digital snooping on couples is unacceptable. Seven in 10 Americans, regardless of whether they are in a relationship, say it is rarely or never acceptable for someone to look at their partner’s cell phone without that person knowing. Still, 34% of adult couples say they’ve looked through their partner’s cell phone without that person knowing, and women are more likely than men to say they’ve done it (42% vs. 25%).
For many adults, social media plays an important role in how they navigate and share information about their romantic relationships. About eight in 10 social media users (81%) report that they at least sometimes see others posting about their relationships, including 46% who say it happens often, but few say seeing them affects what feel about their own love posts. life.
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In addition, social media has become a place where some users discuss relationships and examine old ones. About half of social media users (53%) say they’ve used these platforms to check in with someone they used to date or have a relationship with, while 28% say they’ve used social media to share or discuss things about their relationship or dating life. For adult users under the age of 30, the proportions who have used social media to check up on an ex-partner (70%) or write about their own love life (48%) are even higher.
But social media can also be a source of irritation and conflict for some couples. Among those whose partners use social media, 23% say they feel jealous or insecure about their relationship because of the way their current partner interacts with others on these sites, and that number rises to 34% among 18-year-olds 29 years
Still, some users see these platforms as an important place to show love and affection. This is especially true for younger users who are partners: 48% of social media users aged 18-29 say that social media is very or somewhat important in showing how much they care about their partner.
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These are some of the key findings from a nationally representative survey of 4,860 American adults conducted online October 16-28, 2019 by the Pew Research Center’s American Trends Panel.
Various terms are used in this report to describe people’s current relationship status. This reference guide explains each term.
Single is used to describe people who are not currently in a committed relationship but may be dating casually (31% of the sample).
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Single and looking refers to people who are not in a committed relationship (but may be casually dating) and who are looking for dating or a relationship (15% of the sample).
Casual dating refers to single people who are casually dating someone but not in a committed relationship (4% of the sample).
Cohabitation is used to describe people who currently live with their partner but are not married (11% of the sample).
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Committed relationship is used to describe people who are in a relationship but are not married or cohabiting (8% of the sample).
Single is used to refer to all adults who are not currently married: single, cohabiting, or in a committed relationship (50% of the sample). This term is sometimes used in conjunction with the term “couple” to refer to those who are cohabiting or in a committed relationship (eg, unmarried couples and adults make up 19% of the sample).[/calout] 40% of adults in partnerships say they are bothered by how much time their partner spends on their cell phone
At the time of the survey, four in ten Americans who are married, living with a partner, or in a committed relationship say they are often or sometimes bothered by how much time their partner spends on their cell phone, including 12% who say they feel this way many times
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Additionally, 24% of Americans in partnerships say they are at least sometimes bothered by how much time their partner spends on social media, while a slightly smaller percentage (15%) say they feel the same way about their partner playing video games .
There are certain groups that are more likely to express discomfort with their partner’s digital activities than others. Among adult couples, women are more likely than men to say they are often bothered by the time their partner spends on their cell phone (16% vs. 8%) or playing video games (7% vs. 3% ).
In addition to gender differences, people’s attitudes also vary by age. About 18% of married adults ages 18-49 say they are often bothered by how much time their partner spends on their phone, compared to 6% of those 50 and older. Younger adults in romantic relationships are also more likely than their older counterparts to say they are often annoyed by the amount of time their partner spends on social media (11% vs. 4%) and video games (7% vs. 3% ).
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About half of partners say their partner is distracted by their phone at least sometimes when trying to talk to them
Although relatively few Americans are familiar with the term “phubbing”—which is the practice of snubbing others in favor of their cellphones—notable stocks say they’ve encountered the behavior in their romantic relationships.
When asked to reflect on their partner’s cell phone use, 51% of Americans in a romantic relationship say they at least sometimes distract their partner with their cell phone when trying to have a conversation with them, including 16% who say their partner is often distracted. for your mobile phone unit.
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This pattern differs by age: About six in 10 couples of adults aged 30 to 49 say their partner is at least sometimes distracted by their cell phone when trying to have a conversation with them, compared to 52% of who are between 18 and 29 years old and even smaller shares for those over 50 (41%). Among those in a relationship, younger adults are also more likely than older adults to say their partner is often distracted by their phone when trying to have an argument (20% vs. 10%).
Women in a relationship are more likely than men to say their partner is often distracted by their phone when trying to have a conversation, but this gender difference is more pronounced among younger adults. Three out of ten female partners aged 18 to 29 say that their partner is frequent
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